Before last Wednesday, I had only been to Corner Bistro one other time. The memory is quite vivid yet somehow Kafkaesque in its entirety…. I know I had one Bistro Burger and a Bloody Mary; I know I had another Bistro Burger and another Bloody Mary; and I think I had a chicken sandwich with yet another known Bloody Mary. I know that I somehow ended up at Grey’s Papaya on 4th and 6th but don’t know how I got there; I know I had a hotdog with the works but I don’t know why. And finally, I know that I ended up purchasing a very becoming, straw cowboy hat. I know exactly why I purchased that hat—it was very becoming.
All that is to say that I tried not to take my previous encounter with the famed New York Burger Mecca to my latest one.
There is no doubt that Corner Bistro is synonymous with burger in NYC; they constantly appear on top-ten lists in every periodical and every blog. Before going, I sent a text to 10 guys I know that appreciate a good burger, asking them what they thought was the best burger in NY, and half of them chimed in, “Bistro” (and two more, while recommending different places, added something to the effect of, “…but of course Bistro in the West Vil is great too.” My only apprehension lied in the fact that I had eaten there before and did not find it remarkable—but like I said, I tried not to bring that baggage with me.
Arriving at the Bistro on a pleasant but cold-gathering early spring evening, it was certainly a nice surprise to find that Katie and Cassy had secured a place at the very front of the line (Corner Bistro does not take reservations; rather their reservation system lies within a first-come-first-serve, form-a-line-inside-the-bar system). Tanya literally walked in right behind me and the four of us were able to sit immediately. Diana walked in no more than five minutes later to nicely complete our group.
A round of two-dollar-and-fifty-cent McSorley’s was ordered and…. Wait!.... If anyone missed that, I need them to understand what just happened here…. A round of TWO-DOLLAR-AND-FIFTY-CENT McSorley’s was ordered—this is one of the great things about the Bistro that, in the words of one of our group that was not present on this particular evening—“has to be taken into account.” Indeed it does, sir; indeed it does.
I don’t know how important this is to note, but the waiter was gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that), and actually, that is not the note. The note is that I believe that he kind of took a shine to me. Now either a) I am just that good looking that I can compete in the New York gay community, or b) Because I was sitting with four very attractive women and clearly with none of them (story of my life), that I must have been gay. While I’d like to think “a,” my money’s on “b.” Can’t a brother just get some love…?
Oh, um…where was I…? Oh, yes…. The Bistro….
Because the Bistro offers no real sides or apps, we ordered 6 burgers for the 5 of us. While I would like to believe that this was done on the premise of a rumor that the burgers were small in stature, honestly, I more so think this was just a psychological necessity; we’re just not used to having only burgers and fries on the table. Milk shakes, onion rings, macaroni & cheese—you know. And after all, how could we not…. A Bistro Burger is only $6.75 loaded! Huh? What was that? Here it is again for those of you who didn’t get it…. Wait for it…. Wait for it…. Here it comes…. Yea; I said it, meant it, and won’t take it back…. Bistro Burgers are only $6.75 fully loaded! Take that into account along with the $2.50 McSorley’s and you’ve got yourself a winner for a whopping $9.25.
The Bistro Burger was cooked to the very definition of medium rare—as it was ordered. It was not small—quite large, in fact, and was served on a toasted unassuming bun with lettuce, tomatoes and pickles—all on a just-big-enough-for-the-burger-sized plate. It was splendid. Best in NYC...? No. Really great with great vibe, great juke box and great reputation...? Absolutely. The Bistro is obviously a burger landmark in NYC and I would never dare think of attempting to pick up sticks against it.
Look , at the end of the day, we can throw words around like burger, medium-rare, french-fries, beer…but we all know Les Grossman doesn’t blow up the jungle for nothing…. DIET COKE!
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